No Smoking Diaries: Day Eight

Day Eight (and the intermittent period)

Smoked: 0
Pints drank: ... would u believe me if I said 2 units?
Rants: 3
Of which rational: 0
Calories eaten: Equal to a small cow

Ok, so day eight. I missed a couple of days out because as weird as my behaviour is, the intermittent period was just me moaning about fags and ranting.

But yes... day eight. Strange that I made it here at all since I've spent all week with what I call phantom fag syndrome. I keep thinking I'm either smoking one, (and its so goddamn real i can even feel myself inhaling), or I'm reaching for my packet to have one.

Its strange.

You would think that after a week it would all be out of your system but I could quite easily pick up a pack of tens right now and flame through the entire lot in about 2 hours. But then I am still on patches and to be fair I keep forgetting what I've got on so the other night i went to work with two on from that morning and then I put another two on before I went, forgetting about the original two. Its no wonder I'm daydreaming cigs. I'm probably bloody OD'ing on nicotine substitutes. Although to be fair i haven't seen hide nor head of a pink elephant so i figure I'm doing ok.

The strange thing is that even though I haven't smoked in 8 days I'm waking up most mornings and i feel like I've been on a night out and smoked 40 in the space of 4 hours. Its really bizarre. Hopefully that will pass soon. Fingers crossed.

The worst temptation was going to the pub. everyone who smokes will understand this...
pint and fag.

It's like the strawberries to cream... the horse to the carriage... and other equally cheesy shit that fit together that i cant be arsed to think of.

My point is that should have been my biggest test. To drink, get drunk and not want to buy cigs. I tell you it was damn damn damn hard. We sat in no-smoking so that was a little easier but the friggin fag machine is in the no-smoking section!

GO FIGURE?!

Were the logic in that is, I do not know. But, ah, that damn machine was taunting me all bloody night, looking at me with its neon lights shining the way to my brand. It was difficult not to run over, whack my dosh in, light up and run. I was drawn to it like a stupid moth to a liquefying flame. But I resisted. That was on Monday I think... hmmm...

By Sunday (which was last night) I had been the pub every day apart from Saturday (and that was only missed because i was working).

GREAT!

Instead of smoking I have now developed an alcohol addiction and also a pool addiction which is worse than the alcohol dependency (to be fair that was always there!)

Yes, a pool addiction.

Seriously this week I have spent about 20 quid on playing. It's daft but it keeps my mind off smoking and keeps my hands occupied with something that wont get my bar'd! Bah!

The only real difference I've noticed is that I seem to find money all the time in my purse, pockets, floor, bag... anywhere really. AAAANNND that I'm not choking my poor passive smoker friends to death.

Bad side of it is that I'm going to be 10 stone heavier for my holiday. NOT GOOD! I don't really feel healthier. I cant smell or taste better but i am having freaky friggin dreams still which for a person who rarely dreamed is FREAKING me out. Seriously. some are nice and normal(ish) well the pink one was the most normal. Make your own psycho-analytical B.S on that. But some are bloody horrible. I don't know what that says about my unconscious mind...

But anywho. Day Eight. No patches left today. Woke with a blinding headache. Lets see who cracks first.

Me or the world.

The World has like 60 billion years on me mind you, but whose counting...